NaBloPoMo Advice Column - Day 29 - Trust Yourself

I'm writing 30 thoughts in 30 days for NaBloPoMo. In no particular order, I'm giving you my worldview - as it comes up.

Dear Helen and Connor,
 
By the time you read this, you'll likely be heading towards adulthood. You'll have been given advice from anyone and everyone, and the really hard part is probably going to be sorting it all out. Smart people who you trust will disagree. Someone you love will be wrong. And always, circumstances are changing. And that means I could write the most detailed guidebook in the world, but in the end, it would be insufficient for more than the most basic of existences. You will, above all, have to find a way to trust yourself.
 
I could point out lots of disagreements in my own life, but I think it would serve only to bring up past wounds and the opportunity for an "I told you so" or two - from me or the other party involved. It's enough to let you know that I struggle. Everyone with a heart struggles.
 
A former boss of mine once told me, when discussing a well-known scholar "We disagree with Scholar, but I think the important thing is recognizing that Scholar wants the same thing you and I do. Scholar wants to make the world a better place. We just disagree on how to do that. And the truth is, the problems are so vast, neither one of us knows whose path will work best." I've tried to hold that in my heart as I've disagreed with people over the years. And for me, this has made life a lot easier to tolerate. I assume the best of my political opponents - and I hope you can do that, too. Having said this, I will also guarantee that you will disagree with someone, present the facts as you see them, they will not have an answer, they will lie, and they will use that lie to remain unconvinced. This will likely infuriate you, as it does me. Trust yourself, and keep moving.
 
The good news is that lots of times it will be easy to trust yourself. You'll have a room full of people surrounding you, cheering you on. If you're lucky, you'll have a loved one, friend, or advisor who will talk things through with you and be your rock. But occasionally, your back will be against the wall - and you will know, deep down, the right thing to do. I implore you, Connor and Helen, when that moment happens - trust yourself. Even if it means opposing your own mother, trust yourself and do what is right. Because in the end, you will have to live with yourself and the decisions you make, just as I live with my decisions.
 
Love,
Mommy

Building a worldview:
Day 1: Surround Yourself With Brilliant People (though my friend Susan makes a good point that clever is pretty good, too).
Day 2: Whatever, it works.
Day 3: Surround Yourself With Beauty
Day 4: When You Go Through Something New - Drag Someone With You
Day 5: No sweatpants.
Day 6: Embrace the Crazy
Day 7: Listen to Your Friends or Fight Old Fogey-dom. Get out there. Keep experiencing fun, new things.
Day 8: Don't Let Anyone Sell You Short
Day 9: Take a Lesson From Your Child
Day 10: Consume the best chocolate you can
Day 11: Help your neighbor.
Day 12: Take Breaks
Day 13: Establish a Realistic Rhythm
Day 14: Sometimes, you just have to ask.
Day 15: Loose Lips Sink Ships
Day 16: Stop Things from Going from Bad to Worse
Day 17: Understand the Price of Success
Day 18: Question Everything
Day 19: Drink Great Wine with Old Friends
Day 20: Never Be a Volunteer at a Street Show in New Orleans
Day 21: Let Your Friends Bail You Out
Day 22: Turn Trash Into Treasure
Day 23: Always Have a Dream
Day 24: Give Thanks
Day 25: Develop Your Own Sense of Style - and Own It!
Day 26: Always Have the Ingredients for Chocolate Chip Cookies on Hand
Day 27: Take Advantage of Unseasonably Warm Days

Day 28: Don't Do Too Much When You Have a Head Cold